Lady Mate on the Boat - Pro or Con? - SaltwaterCentral.Com

Post new topic   Reply to topic
 

KatfishKayak
Posts: 162
Location: Duplin County, NC
Reply with quote
Tue Aug 27, 2019 11:54 am
Here's a question/topic for anyone who cares to chime in...

I'm running a brand new charter in the SENC area, and still running at a (very) slow burn as I start to build some business. My wife is usually my mate on trips, and she's worried that it might hurt our business having a woman on the boat. She feels like guys might feel inhibited when she's there, and not have as much fun as they might on an all-male boat.

On the one hand, I can understand her point. We saw it in hunting camps when I was guiding and she would come out to help, where the tone of conversation definitely changed when she was around... at least until the clients got to know her. But it never really seemed to be a big deal to the clients. Many of them re-booked, and some even asked about her when she wasn't there.

I figure it's mostly manners... men are generally taught to be more polite around women... and that's not a bad thing. Personally, I feel like, if being a little polite really ruins your enjoyment of the trip, then I don't really care to have you on my boat anyway.

However, I am curious to hear from some other fishermen and captains. Do you guys adjust your behavior if there's a woman on the boat, and if so, does it take away from the enjoyment of the trip? Do you feel like you can't cuss, fart, and talk dirty if there is a female aboard (a female, by the way, who regularly out-cusses me)? If so, what would help you feel more comfortable?

Bottom line is, I'm not going to make her stay home while I run trips, regardless. Part of the whole plan was to have this thing we can do together. So it'll be what it is. But I am curious.
_________________
Capt Phillip Loughlin
Katfish Kayak and Fishing Adventures, LLC
Kayak Mothership and Offshore Fishing Charters
Canyon Wren - Parker 2320 SC - 300hp Yamaha
  
View user's profile Send private message

blueoceaneyez
Posts: 3258
Location: Carolina Beach NC
Reply with quote
Tue Aug 27, 2019 12:13 pm
I'm following this to read the replies... lol....

Personally, from another woman's point of view, if anyone doesn't want to book a trip with you because you have a woman mate, then you don't need them on your boat. I know a few men who think this way around Wilmington!!!!!!!!!!!! And even outside of fishing they are still a-holes...that's just who they are. If she is good and wants to, let her do it, the business will follow based on your success in getting fish in the boat not based on you having a female mate. Take it from me, men still whip it out to pee, cuss, fart, dirty jokes, etc!!! =P
_________________
Capt Amanda King
Carolina Beach Inshore Guide
198 Elite Carolina Skiff 115hp Suzuki
Online: www.SecondWindFishing.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/SecondWindFishing
Instagram: www.instagram.com/capt.amanda.king
  
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail

KatfishKayak
Posts: 162
Location: Duplin County, NC
Reply with quote
Tue Aug 27, 2019 12:48 pm
Thanks, Captain. I knew you were on this site, and I was sort of hoping to hear your take on this. I actually told her about you when this discussion came up Saturday. She definitely enjoys being out there, and I sure would hate for this to take away from her love of it. I can't help thinking that this is a bigger deal in her own mind than it is to most fishermen.

And I'm with you on that thing.. if you don't want to fish with a woman on the boat, then there are plenty of other boats to choose from. Lord knows there's no shortage of charters around here! :-D
_________________
Capt Phillip Loughlin
Katfish Kayak and Fishing Adventures, LLC
Kayak Mothership and Offshore Fishing Charters
Canyon Wren - Parker 2320 SC - 300hp Yamaha
  
View user's profile Send private message

Fishfull-Thinking
Posts: 78
Location: Bolivia, NC
Reply with quote
Tue Aug 27, 2019 12:59 pm
My $.02 on this.....

To me, gender doesn't matter one bit. What matters is the abilities of the mate. I've been on plenty of boats with captains and mates that were female and the fishing experience was no different than an all male crew. Typically, the female crew just blended in with the male customers... no issues!

Keep her as your deckie, I think 99% of your customers will appreciate it. The other 1% you probably don't want anyway.
_________________
John Lyons
Fishfull Thinking- 2018 Parker 2510 DV twin Yamaha 250\'s
  
View user's profile Send private message

Bilzo
Posts: 2096
Location: Pittsboro, NC
Reply with quote
Tue Aug 27, 2019 2:01 pm
I don't care what the gender is of the mate (or the captain). If they're competent and can do the job that's what's most important.

Would I act differently around a female mate, than a male one? Absolutely. But would it impact my level of fun? Only if the female mate was a killjoy, and by that I mean somebody who took the fun out of it, and I've had male mates do that very thing as well. I've been on a charter boat that has a female mate, and rebooked it.
Yeah - I'm likely to cut up a bit more lewdly and I'd have no worries about pissing over the rail if there's no women on board, but I don't have to do that to have fun. It's about being respectful to all.

I book a charter to go catch fish and have fun. The gender of the crew should have no bearing on my ability to do either.
  
View user's profile Send private message

wavescrash
Posts: 3684
Reply with quote
Tue Aug 27, 2019 2:50 pm
I'm with Amanda, but then I don't act any different around women than I do men.  
View user's profile Send private message

carpepiscem
Posts: 21
Reply with quote
Tue Aug 27, 2019 3:03 pm
I agree with Amanda. If the presence of a woman dampens their spirits so much because they can't be as vulgar as they want to be, then you really don't want them aboard anyway.  
View user's profile Send private message

Crabbie
Posts: 305
Location: greenville & emerald isle
Reply with quote
Tue Aug 27, 2019 4:29 pm
My wife is the capt. of are ride and I enjoy everyday we fish together. Don"t worry about loss busniess because you don't need that kind of people on your ride. Good luck& keep fishing
_________________
2018 23\' Outrage 250 Verado
  
View user's profile Send private message

stevehes
Posts: 627
Location: Raleigh & Carolina Beach
Reply with quote
Tue Aug 27, 2019 7:52 pm
If your customers want to fish, it doesn't matter. If they want to party and cut up it will.
If she's a good mate it's all good, gender doesn't matter 1 bit. If she's there because your wife and available then thats a different problem.
I've fished with Amanda several times and had a great time and recommend her whenever inshore guides come up in conversation. But thats because she is good not because she can't pee over the side :)
_________________
Steve in Carolina Beach

Contender 25 200 Verados
Contender 23 - SOLD
  
View user's profile Send private message

KatfishKayak
Posts: 162
Location: Duplin County, NC
Reply with quote
Tue Aug 27, 2019 9:18 pm
Thanks for the input so far, folks. It mostly confirms my gut feeling.

Good points from you, Stevehes. She doesn't have the deep experience that I have, which is why she manages the helm while I'm working on the deck with rods, reels, and customers. We've got a pretty solid routine down, whether we're running the charter or fishing for ourselves. If she were a detriment, we wouldn't be doing this thing.

Oh, since it's come up a time or two... she can (and does) pee over the side. She is a vocal evangelist for the SheWee. I've never dealt with the challenges of femininity, but this thing sure makes her more comfortable when we're offshore. :-D
_________________
Capt Phillip Loughlin
Katfish Kayak and Fishing Adventures, LLC
Kayak Mothership and Offshore Fishing Charters
Canyon Wren - Parker 2320 SC - 300hp Yamaha
  
View user's profile Send private message

zigzag
Posts: 2067
Reply with quote
Wed Aug 28, 2019 1:29 am
I would say that depends on your mate, if she is a mature and hard working that is good, if she shows up in the morning with shorts with her butt cheeks hanging out that may be fun for awhile, until the guy's wives start calling and complaining, that is a whole different story, but for the most part good natured female mates should not be a problem.  
View user's profile Send private message

blueoceaneyez
Posts: 3258
Location: Carolina Beach NC
Reply with quote
Wed Aug 28, 2019 1:30 am
What?! A shewee!! I have seen it all now!! Hahaha!! That beats cutting the top off a Gatorade bottle!!!!
_________________
Capt Amanda King
Carolina Beach Inshore Guide
198 Elite Carolina Skiff 115hp Suzuki
Online: www.SecondWindFishing.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/SecondWindFishing
Instagram: www.instagram.com/capt.amanda.king
  
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail

KatfishKayak
Posts: 162
Location: Duplin County, NC
Reply with quote
Wed Aug 28, 2019 11:14 am
blueoceaneyez wrote:
What?! A shewee!! I have seen it all now!! Hahaha!! That beats cutting the top off a Gatorade bottle!!!!


She swears by it and uses it most trips. I have to bring the fishermen into the cabin for a minute in the interest of modesty, of course, but other than that, she takes care of business just like us guys do. A good rinse, and it's stowed for next time. Pretty amazing device.
_________________
Capt Phillip Loughlin
Katfish Kayak and Fishing Adventures, LLC
Kayak Mothership and Offshore Fishing Charters
Canyon Wren - Parker 2320 SC - 300hp Yamaha
  
View user's profile Send private message

paynefish
Posts: 370
Location: Beaufort
Reply with quote
Wed Aug 28, 2019 11:42 am
If you gotta go, you gotta go. A shewee, thats a new one. I like it
_________________
Seafox 246 Commander

The Happy Place
  
View user's profile Send private message

fishing-misfit
Posts: 76
Location: Hampstead NC
Reply with quote
Wed Aug 28, 2019 3:40 pm
If you put clients on fish, most probably don't care. But, I am sure you will run across the occasional asshole that drinks too much and opens his mouth too many times.
_________________
Chris
2019 Sportsman Masters 247 Bay - Yamaha 300
  
View user's profile Send private message

Fernie
Posts: 775
Reply with quote
Wed Aug 28, 2019 3:53 pm
SheWee! My wife uses the SheBucket. Keep her as your mate, I see no problem.  
View user's profile Send private message

BILLFISHIN
Posts: 921
Location: Wilmington NC
Reply with quote
Wed Aug 28, 2019 4:52 pm
SHE SOULD TELL THE GUEST FIRST THING THAT SHE IDENTIFIES AS A MALE! :)  
View user's profile Send private message

Post new topic   Reply to topic


Jump to:   

You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum

Lady Mate on the Boat - Pro or Con? - SaltwaterCentral.Com